A year ago, even 6 months ago, I had so many questions.
Why did this happen? Why didn’t my accomplishments make me proud? Why did it seem like every minor mistake I made was blasted on the big screen? Why did my supervisor belittle and neglect me? Why did I get passed over for opportunities to advance even though I was qualified? Why did the boy I love not love me enough to commit? Why did my best friend only make time to see me when it was convenient for her? Why aren’t I enough?
The list goes on.📃 However, the commonality with all of these questions is how riddled with self-doubt I felt and I didn’t even know it. 🙇🏻♀️ I thought I was motivated and giving everything a fair shot. I was doing the best I could but I was also wearing the shoes of a victim. I made myself small.
I felt like the world was happening around me and to me without ME having any say in it. I still feel like this almost every day. And every day I remind myself I am in control of my life.💡 Not because I have any supernatural powers to control the way things play out or how someone feels about me…but because I have control over how I choose to look at the world and the many actions that come with that.
It is approaching life with the idea that I deserve to be here instead of wondering “why me?”. It is about my development of strengths rather than being ruled by perceived weaknesses.🧗🏻♀️ It’s a shift from self-hinderance to self-empowerment.
I am growing and blossoming. In an effort to be more authentic to myself, I want to start posting more regularly on here with similar thoughts to these.
For anyone else trying to step into their own, I recognize you and I respect you. You are not alone.
Today is also Mother’s Day. From the perspective of a daughter with a challenging relationship with her own mother, I think we are all trying. Whatever shape or form that takes changes. It isn’t always understood or expressed effectively. We are trying to do our best to take care of ourselves and those we care about. 💗
This post was originally published in July of 2018 with the title “How to Make the Choice to Change – Know Your Worth”. It has been majorly updated to provide better information and clarity on choice and making changes.
There are two significant factors which affect satisfaction that I have noticed in myself and those around me. The first is a real, intentional choice. When we make a choice we are exerting our control over a situation that will affect us and therefore having a say in what happens. The second factor that tremendously impacts how we view ourselves and, thus, what we deserve is our values. While choice is the actionable step to help us make a change, what we value is the motivation behind the desire for a change.
So much of what we do in everyday life is a CHOICE.
We choose to get out of bed in the morning or postpone it by hitting snooze for 30 minutes. We choose to cook breakfast for ourselves or drive through any easily-accessible fast-food chain. We choose to greet people with a smile or walk past strangers without a glance. We choose to react when a friend cancels plans or when the store sells out of our favorite shampoo.
Many times, we consider these things to be controlled by outside forces, situational occurrences, or even other people. When we deflect blame or view our lives as a series of events happening to us instead of because of us, or with us, we relinquish our golden power. We abandon personal responsibility which, yes, may mean facing consequences but it also means having the ability to turn a problem around or craft a new plan of pursuit. I’m all for taking a qualifying stance on issues but, when it comes to my life and choices, I don’t personally see there being an in-between. I am either a victim to my life’s situations or I am my own person. I either have a choice or I don’t.
I believe we all have a choice. It is also my belief that my choice and your choice can happily coexist in the world together.
I won’t go into this subject too deeply but I feel the need to quickly address the “lack” mentality many of us carry. The idea that, “If that person over there has success in his/her career then that takes away from the chance for me to have success in my career”. That is a lie. Success (or whatever quality we may envy in someone else that presumably occurred because of their choices) is relative to each person. It comes from each individual’s perception of the quality.
The forms of choice in a day that I described earlier may seem very tangible but a change in perspective also plays a huge role in the course of action behind a choice. We need not be moving to take a fruitful and actionable step. Sometimes we can physically manipulate the outcome of a situation but, more often, change in the life we experience really comes when our mentality shifts. That is: when we can take personal responsibility for all of the things that are happening to us.
Yet, action is only one piece of the puzzle of choice. Action is meaningless without intention behind it, guiding it.
As humans, we are excellent at justification. It is easier to not take responsibility and not be accountable for choices; then, complain about how our lives aren’t going the way we want even though we so badly wish for them to change. It requires almost stepping into a new role as to how you view yourself and the world–and that takes practice. That could mean saying yes to opportunities that align with your interests and no to that which does not serve you. If that does not offer results, then you may need to reassess your values.
Here’s an easy exercise: write down a sentence naming something that you want, but have not been able to achieve, and WHY you want it. There might be multiple reasons behind why you want it so go ahead and list whatever comes to mind. Then, go deeper and ask yourself why you value that. The goal is to get to the root reasoning as to why you feel something will make you happy.
Many times we can hold onto a very materialistic notion of what can make us happy. This can involve things like: earning a certain amount of money, taking a trip somewhere, having a romantic partner, or purchasing much-desired pair of shoes. This is when we are continuously on the hunt for a new shiny toy, big or small, to spark our interests. Other times, what can make us happy it isn’t anything tangible…but more of a goal or vision of who we want to be or where we would like to see ourselves. I consider situations like this to be a wistful postponing of pleasure. In other words, instead of allowing or cultivating things in your life right now, you opt to wait because you believe later will be better. Later you’ll have more experience, be stronger or fitter, be more financially secure, or simply be more confident in yourself.
I admit, I’m quite guilty of this thought pattern myself. Once in a while I will have a period where I slip into the trap of thinking I’ve been taking action but all I’ve done is find reasons not to do something. It can be a sticky situation. I know I want things to change but I also don’t feel the direction I’ve been going is benefiting me as I would’ve liked. So, where do I go from here? It trickles down to values.
On a surface level, our choices may change but that is because our values change. We then feel at conflict when our actions, whether they be physical or mental in nature, don’t provide changes that we desire. It is a constant work in progress–the old cyclical “lather, rinse, and repeat”. Except, with the topic of change, it is: 1) assessment of personal values, 2) actionable choices, and 3) see where that goes! If the outcome isn’t what you want, then lather up again / reconsider what your motivating values are.
I think there is endless opportunity to feel oppressed and resigned to circumstances. Societal norms have crafted an atmosphere where finger-pointing and projection is easier than dealing with our own problems. However, there is equal if not greater reason to make a choice to change that line of thinking into one that aligns with creating happiness.
If you’ve read this far into the post then you more than likely feel that inkling of a desire to create a change, too. Know that it is possible and, while it requires constant upkeep, it is not a chore. It is a gift to be able to make choices that align with our values and create the life we want. We are all deserving of a happy life; so is there any reason not to start making changes today?
In conversation with a dear friend of mine recently, he said one thing he likes about me is that I am tirelessly ambitious in the area of self-improvement. He said it with genuine admiration and I appreciated his noticing because I’d say that’s a quality I highly value in myself. Ambition, not in the cut-throat, reckless sense of the word but in the goal-setting, driven meaning of it.
I pride myself on self-development and, because of that, I like to see other people improve themselves.
There is a popular quote, attributed to Jim Rohn that goes, “You’re the average of the five people spend the most time with”. It is a phrase I’ve heard tossed around but I’ve been considering how that rings true lately. I think the intention behind the words is to keep people around who are supportive in your journey. Not just people who will give you a pat-on-the-back or offer the standard, “Congratulations on your achievement!” sort of support but people who will go through the thick of the roughage with you and you with them!
It is already difficult enough to make friends who are like-minded, supportive, and willing to put in effort into a friendship. We attract and maintain friendships with people usually because they serve one of those 3 purposes. Yet, I’ve also been thinking about how the needs of my own friendships have changed over time.
In my young adult life, I discovered the concept of self-work and, as I mentioned earlier, I enjoy spending time on that.
The act of setting goals and creating intentions is part of my weekly, if not daily vocabulary. I even have a list of the many areas I’d like to grow in and things I’d like to accomplish but I recognize I can only sanely manage a few things at a time. Therefore, I frequently set mini goals to work on and over time, use these to gauge my improvement. This is the sort of stuff that lights me up. I love seeing growth in myself through measures of my own design and my own choosing. I digress….
So, what has been troubling for me to discover is that not everyone is on the mission of self-improvement. I don’t mean to be so ignorant as to assume everyone wants the same thing as me. However, I admit I was under the impression that others wanted more, too.
This isn’t about me being young and naïve or having a world of possibilities ahead of me. (Though, many people I’ve spoken with who are older than I am like to say that.) I believe self-development knows no age limit. I’ve seen it play out firsthand that one is never too young or too old to take an interest in improving themselves. All a person needs is a desire for change and a little motivation to propel it forward.
For some, they are content with what they have and where they are at. They may not even be thrilled by the life they are living but they are comfortable and that is enough to keep them stagnant or simply not searching for more. To clarify what I mean by more, I’m talking about the stuff we can’t touch. It is common for us to think of ways to “improve” ourselves through a job, our paycheck, or being able to afford to purchase things we like or want. However, those are all material things and the intangiblemore isn’t visible on the physical plane we often dwell. The intangible are the goals and personal growth I was talking about earlier but also connection! While elusive to the naked eye, all of this is much more substantial and satisfying to our spirits!
People, of course, have the right to live their lives as they wish but when I am considering the people I surround myself with, I seek depth. I want to be able to share my experiences with people close to me and have them understand. I want to hear about the obstacles and naysayers standing in a person’s way and feel inspired by their persistence to combat the barriers in front of them with a brave face. I want to have relationships with people where we can discuss how we would like to strive for more—not because we are wildly dissatisfied with our current state but—because we know there is more to experience!
I have done a lot of self-work and only see more room for my own improvement. The less acknowledged area of exploration is the universe that exists inside of us. So, for me, it isn’t a chore or a mission; it’s just empowering to see what I am capable of and be brave enough to challenge myself even when the future is unknown.
I spend so much time with myself and consuming content from online influencers who are of a similar vibe but I want that real life connection. It’s awesome to open up my phone and have this inspiring influx of information but I feel called to reassess the friendships I have held onto so tightly. Little by little I have lost touch with more friends than I have acquired. That is okay because it is all about quality over quantity for me. However, as I’ve been going through my health coaching program, I see a huge potential for expansion in myself. I then look around me and am at a bit of a loss for individuals of the same vibe to share in the journey with.
Without going into all the details about childhood wounds and whatnot, I’m now able to reflect on the people I’ve surrounded myself with throughout my life and how they’ve served me. They benefited me for the place I was at but I can now look back and realize I wanted more then, too. It’s like, when you have a feeling of something and you just don’t know the word for it. I could feel I wanted more out of the people I surrounded myself with but I did not know what that meant, nonetheless how to acquire that. In recent years I’ve been able to understand myself and my needs a lot more. So, I’ve come to a place where I can’t save space for people who aren’t voracious about improvement or motivated to be better.
I do not have ill will toward any of the friends I grew up with or met later in life. I think everyone is where they are supposed to be for their personal journey. Some people stay content forever without ever doing the self-development work that I am personally so invested in…and that is okay. However, it is accessible to everyone. There is a universe that exists inside of each of us and we can all explore it if only we have the desire.
The greatest thing I can do is learn and when I feel the changes I seek in myself happening, I am encouraged to keep going. It is a process that knows no limit to depth. So rather than be preoccupied over where the high-vibe, growth-driven people I desire are, I trust the process; that through my self-work, I am already calling in the expansive people who can journey with me at this next part of my life.
Have you cut ties with friends because you needed different things than they could provide? Or have you grown with your friends? I’d love to hear what your experiences are.
We as people tend to look at actions as something with a definitive conclusion. Like, the way you can say you walked to the park. Your action was walking and you got to the park. End of action, end of story. Yet, there are some actions that happen as more of a process. Healing is more of a process.
Today’s post is about the expectations placed around the process of healing. It isn’t as straightforward as we may want it to be and I’m diving into some of the reasons I’ve found we may be resistant “to heal”. The photo above is a poem I wrote during a thick part of my healing process. Throughout this post, I’ve also included some of my favorite quotations on the subject which I found on my home space, Instagram. If you like this post, definitely don’t hesitate to drop a comment or share this post with a friend!
Last year, I went through some emotionally trying times and I was in a major state of constant ups and downs. In my pit of depression, I’d search for glimmers of light to push me to move forward. It might have been a creative idea or a small motivational phrase but it would be enough incentive for me to pick myself up. I’d start to feel okay and fathom the possibility that: hey, maybe I’m all better now! Then, when I least expected it, the most minute thing would remind me of the hurt or sadness I experienced and I’d feel like Alice falling down the rabbit hole all over again.
There are many facets of emotion to work through and sometimes the best we can aim for is feeling OKAY.
Maybe for some people, they only need to go through a down and up experience once and then “they are healed” or they’ve learned their lesson. For others, it can take a little bit longer. This could be dependent on how much you internalize the obstacle you’re trying to work through. The more connected you feel to a problem the more it really becomes yourproblem. This can certainly be a great cause for change if there is action you can take to better the situation.
Yet, what happens when the experience you feel so connected to is in the past? When there isn’t any current action you can take to improve the experience? You essentially have to make a choice on whether you want to stay stuck in the past or take a risk on the unknown of the future.
In healing, the priority is to uncover the root issue so that we can move forward with success.
When you associate so closely to experiences that are in the past that is where you will stay. The days will certainly go on and time will keep moving forward but everything you are holding onto will keep you from enjoying the present. Consequently, if you remain stuck in the past, you won’t ever truly work through the experience that has plagued you.
Most problems that exist are only problems because we choose to see them that way.
You may run into the same fundamental issue of an obstacle in different forms—that can be: situations, figurative roadblocks, people, or anything. The challenging part is dealing with the real, root issue that is causing distress. While it may seem easier to sweep emotions under the rug, you’re choosing to limit your spectrum for happiness. If we view something as a problem but never seek to understand it, the problem still exists inside of us and it will keep manifesting in the physical world until we address it. To put it plainly, emotions need proper acknowledgement or else we won’t ever “heal”. That is a fact.
I’d like to say healing is a 3 step process of: 1) Recognize what limiting beliefs you hold, 2) Acknowledge your problem, 3) The problem is gone! However, healing does not work like that. I’ll restrain from saying healing takes time (though I suppose I did still say it) and argue the more actionable step in healing is deciding when you’ve had enough and can be at peace with the state of the situation, whatever that may be.
The down and ups that I talked about earlier happened more times than I can count just pertaining to one situation. I told myself that I wanted to overcome the experience although I mostly just wanted to overcome the pain, discomfort, and sadness parts. Unknowingly at the time, I wanted to maintain the association I had with my experience because I was optimistic and hoped for things to turn around. Yet, I had reached the end of the road long ago and just didn’t want to believe that was true.
One of my favorite phrases is: healing isn’t linear. There’s no ONE WAY to heal. It will look different for everyone and it will look different for each hardship you face.
Healing can involve:
Holding onto the experience to define you and creating new labels for yourself
Pandering between wanting to control a situation and letting go
Feeling like the best is behind you and opening up to the possibility that better things are ahead
Connecting with your emotional experience and wanting to separate from it
Sinking into the deep hole that is your pain and using it as a motivator to climb out
Wishfully looking at your past experience and also towards the future
It is hard to say when healing really is complete.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news but, even after you work through one hardship, there will be more to come. In Mark Manson’s The Subtle Art of Not Giving A F*ck, he makes an interesting point that problems are always going to exist. Though, working through them helps us develop skills, gain perspective, and resilience. Consequently, we will be set up to get slightly better problems in the future and likely be more equipped to handle them!
I’ve gone through moments where I think I’ve truly worked through what I need to come to terms with and made my peace. Then, something new comes up and I find myself confused, frustrated, or in a random bout of sadness and tearing up. I accept all of these parts of me and that’s how I know that I’m healing. It’s a cycle, it’s an ebb and flow, and it’s a constant learning process.
I hope this post finds you when you can use it most. If you are going through the back and forth feelings as a result of hardship, I hope you know you are exactly where you need to be.
You know the feeling when you ate a little too much at dinner or maybe you mixed some food and drinks that you wish you didn’t? In that state of discomfort, I personally feel desperate for a little relief and, because of that, I have tried out many remedies to bring my tummy back into balance.
It wasn’t too long ago that I would carry tums in my purse and pop them almost daily to help with digestive distress. Tums are primarily supposed to be used for fighting excessive acid production which usually comes from eating hot and spicy foods. They serve to hinder stomach acid production but, at the same time, you are suppressing the acids that serve to DIGEST what you ate. So, it puts a wet blanket on the issue but the actual process of digestion will take longer.
While the easiest fix for alleviating excessive stomach acid production is to minimize acid reflux-causing foods in your diet, general digestive discomfort can be a bit more complex. For me, digestive distress comes along the lines of: an immense feeling of fullness, bloating, or just an unsettling feeling then keep reading. It isn’t as simple as going to the bathroom or burping to relieve oneself.
When I was feeling physically ill last year, I was trying all sorts of methods to help with my gut dysbiosis. The Balanced Blonde actually has a great post on the topic which you can read here but it was such an ongoing battle that I knew I needed extra help. I’ve had a small arsenal of essential oils but was not using them much until this point.
The essential oils that I like using are from a brand called Young Living. I’ve tried random brands from Vitamin Shoppe or the grocery store but there are a few reasons I keep going back to YL. 1) What I particularly like about YL essential oils is because of their sustainable methods for sourcing the ingredients for the oils and the quality testing that goes into each batch. 2) With that testing, they have formulated essential oils safe for internal consumption. Most essential oils are only for topical or aromatic use so I wouldn’t recommend ingesting any old brand you pick up at the store.
So, going back to this remedy of mine, I use a blend of massively potent and healing essential oils called Digize paired with straight up castor oil. In case you aren’t familiar with Digize, the blend contains: Tarragon, Ginger, Peppermint, Juniper, Fennel, Lemongrass, Anise, and Patchouli. Each of these ingredients is beneficial on its own—think: peppermint tea!—but when combined, they are a powerhouse for digestive support. Plus, the castor oil is not simply the vehicle for me to spread Digize on my tummy—it contains an array of benefits that research has linked to boosting the lymphatic system, inducing labor in pregnant women, and stimulating the digestive system!
Of course, do your own research and experimentation to see if castor oil and/or Digize could be right for you but now I’ll get into the HOW part of my remedy routine!
The best time for me to do my tummy balance remedy is at night after I have taken a shower. It is very soothing so this also helps to wind me down for the night. I recommend doing this in your bedroom or someplace you won’t be disturbed so as to enhance the peaceful experience!
My first step is dry brushing my entire body. I feel like this helps encourage circulation and detoxification—both being helpful when I’m trying to alleviate digestive discomfort. I’ll also rub any lotion I want on my body, while avoiding my stomach.
Next, I’ll lie down on my back. You can lay down a towel or blanket, if you’d like. Here is where I’ll be using my castor oil and Digize! I don’t measure it out but I pour about a half-tablespoon amount of castor oil into the palm of my hand and add a drop of Digize. Then, I simply smear the mixture onto my belly. The power is in the ingredients but there is also a strategy to massaging the stomach which can help speed up digestion.
Method: Using whichever hand you feel most comfortable with, start at the top of your stomach (about palm-width above your belly button). Press firmly, but not so much as to cause pain, into your stomach with your index and middle finger. Move your fingers towards your left side and then down and then up on your right side til you reach the center again. Basically, you’re moving your hands in a clockwise motion.
I usually keep this massage going for 3-5 minutes before adding my heating pad. For a long time I just did the massage and that works great! However, if you have access to a heating pad, I highly recommend using one. The heat works to activate the castor oil and help the ingredients penetrate your stomach. The warmth stimulates digestive recovery and, as I said earlier, this feels very soothing!
I’ve honestly fallen asleep with the heating pad on my stomach (temperature set to LOW) because it is that relaxing. I’ll wake up and turn it off soon after but if you find yourself in this situation you may want to set an alarm so that you won’t spend the entire night laying there with the heating pad. Seriously!
Alright, that is the end of my tummy balance remedy using castor oil and Digize. If you experience any sort of digestive distress, I hope you found this post helpful and give the routine a try!
During my recent Sugar Detox, I struggled with trying to banish my cravings. I whipped up some sugar-free snacks and stuffed my face with roasted sweet potatoes and bananas because they were free of “added-sugar”. I’m not even upset about the way I approached things because it led me to figuring out a really helpful tip that I now use EVERY TIME I EAT A MEAL.
Before I share the tip (impatient folks can scroll down) I want to clarify my approach on the sugar detox. I wanted to eliminate added-sugars because I sensed those were the major culprit for my wild and uncontrollable cravings. Sometimes I wouldn’t necessarily even be hungry for a sweet but all I needed to do was look at a skillet cookie and BAM! The entire thing might as well be in my stomach because I felt like my self-control was on vacation. Who else can relate?
I’ve since learned that self-control around food is primarily determined by the “baggage” we may be bringing to our plates. Think of it: we spend our days knocking out chores, running errands all over town, meeting with people, and oftentimes chowing down food on-the-go. How well do you think your mind recognizes the food you eat when you’re spooning overnight oats in between passing lanes? Plus, what about all of that erratic energy you’re bringing into your meal?
The field of nutrition is thought of as a body of food rules. However, I don’t believe in a world where food is only something we have to eat to survive. Food is meant to be enjoyed. Yet, for myself and probably many people, there is also a need for moderation. It is up to us as individuals to determine how much moderation to apply and where we want to strengthen or loosen our grips on that relationship with food.
As a matter of fact, the tip I’m about to share was something I picked up because I wanted to set boundaries and stop reaching for food when I wasn’t hungry. On the other hand, it can totally be used if you want to expand your food options and feel less restrictive.
The free and life-changing tip that I now practice for a healthier relationship with food is: GIVING THANKS.
In Western culture, we can be pretty self-indulgent and come to expect certain things in our day-to-day life so much so that the things that really matter get taken for granted. Every day we eat a meal, at least once but, probably a few times. Food is widely available and that almost reduces its perceived value because we think we can just get more later. That may be true accessibility-wise but I like to think about the process that made the food possible. The growing process, the farmers, the store I purchased the food, and the preparation involved.
Just try…next time, instead of jamming a forkful of food into your mouth the moment you lay eyes on your plate, try turning it into an experience. I knew a friend who would carefully hold something that she was about to eat and smell it. She’d legitimately spend a few seconds just smelling her food before eating it! That blew my mind! It was basically a full sensory experience. So, I like to take as much time as possible (without letting my food get cold) before eating to appreciate my food.
Here is what that usually looks like for me:
When possible, I prefer to take a seat at a table and in a space without noise and distractions. Then, I like to stare at my plate a little bit. I smile and think about the way I took my time to prepare my food—or, if someone else made it, then I think about how appreciative I am that they prepared this dish for me. I’ll give my dish a sniff and then place my hands together, and, with my eyes closed, just express thanks for whatever comes to mind. (Thanks can also be directed towards whomever or whatever you’d like: God, Jesus, the Earth, Mother Nature, the Universe, anything!)
Taking a moment to express a few words of gratitude helps me feel present and appreciate what I have. Any other stuff going on in my day or life is set aside, for this moment, so that I can eat in peace. Giving thanks helps me eat more slowly and, consequently, be more attuned to my body. In that state, I can make better decisions for myself and I am significantly less likely to reach for unnecessary second helpings, snacks, or my vice: sweets. 🙂
When I started implementing my life-changing practice, I felt like I finally understood Michael Pollan’s famous words about eating food, but not too much, and mostly plants.
It really isn’t complicated but giving thanks before a meal is almost a lost art. So, tell me, did you grow up giving thanks for meals? Do you currently have a gratitude practice related to food?
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