I have long been interested in personal development as a concept and as a practice for my own self-betterment. Yet, it wasn’t until recently how much I really enjoyed seeing other people’s growth and realizations about themselves in film. There’s something really amazing to me when I can watch a character’s journey and self-development as it is captured on film–particularly in a coming-of-age film!
Most people don’t experience dramatic changes all of a sudden but film allows you to follow a character over a period of time as they face a challenge, learn through an experience, or get involved in something new which completely shifts the way they are as a person. That beautiful growth, I feel, is so wonderfully captured in coming-of-age films in ways unrivaled by other genres of film.
As a quick sidenote: I am frequently using the word “film” here as opposed to movies, largely because I believe films to be more representative of an artwork made with intention (that may or may not be entertaining). Movies, on the other hand, strive for entertainment but may not always be accompanied by the artistic lens and intentional approach that films are keen on. I won’t ramble on about this but I think Robert Hardy describes it well here if you’re curious about the difference between films and movies.
To get back on point, I have always been drawn toward coming-of-age films are realized only recently that they often depict characters in struggles of self-acceptance, insecurities, friendships and relationships, exploring independence and cultivating values better representative of who they are now. Something I like to say is that these are movies about life.
So, if you, too, enjoy coming-of-age movies or if you’re curious to explore them, then keep reading.
Coming-of-Age Films You Should See
The Art of Getting By
What’s amazing about this film, besides the New York City setting, is the ease of which the main character goes about his life. George has his own schema based on what he knows and, as he is about to graduate high school, he’s been sliding by without really trying. It’s not until he meets Sally that he gets exposed to ideas, situations, and complications of the real world outside of his own.
Call Me By Your Name
On the surface, this story follows Elio as he blossoms into his own sensuality and sexual awakening upon meeting the older Oliver, a grad student staying with his family in Italy. In some ways, the romance between Elio and Oliver is a bit predatory but the genuineness of being young and falling in love is also beautifully shown here.
The Spectacular Now
Life seems to be all rainbows for the main character, Sutter, who has no thought about the future and only about living in the moment. It isn’t until he meets Aimee, who is different from the girls he’s known before, that his unpierceable veil of having it all together quickly crumbles. It definitely isn’t the healthiest portrayal of a relationship but there’s also room for a variety of relationships in coming-of-age films.
It’s Kind of a Funny Story
A suicidal teen checks himself into a psych ward and meets a few wacky but entirely normal friends. Through the characters, the story depicts how everyone has their own thing going on but rather than feel messed up because of the way he feels, his challenge is to come to acceptance and understanding of his own, and everyone else’s, unique quirks and stories.
Laggies
When Megan is faced with a proposal from her boyfriend, she runs away unsure of how to handle the situation. She befriends the much younger Annika and who Megan easily connects with because of her own adolescent tendencies. Megan is so used to living like a child without responsibility but, through Annika, she learns to step into her age and herself.
The Perks of Being a Wallflower
Like many of the films on this list, The Perks of Being a Wallflower is based on a book however, I much prefer the film adaptation of this one. While the book reads like a series of letters, the film catalogs Charlie’s reemergence into friendships, love, and even himself so vividly. Despite the trauma of his childhood, Charlie discovers who he is and his infinite value with the help of two good friends which is what makes this 90s era film eternally relatable.
Paper Towns
Another book that’s much better as a film adaptation, in my opinion. Paper Towns the book felt like a story where nothing really happens but the film highlights friendship in a beautiful way. A group of teens soon to graduate from high school get together in search of their friend Margo who has suddenly disappeared. What they thought they’d find and what they actually do find are each their own.
The Age of Seventeen
Nadine feels like her life is thrown upside-down when her best friend begins dating her older brother. While the betrayal stings, Nadine struggles to find ways to open up to the people around her. She seeks validation from adults and boys in the hopes of feeling like she is important too. The Age of Seventeen is a depiction of learning to use your words and give yourself what you crave instead of seeking ways to fill a void.
Ladybird
“Ladybird” feels beyond her high school life and helicopter parents and strives to live the life she dreams of. She all too quickly abandons her best friend and her true interests to pursue the grown up life she thinks she should have. Through the avant-garde main character, we see that you need not look outside yourself for who you are.
St. Elmo’s Fire
Different from most of the films on this list, St. Elmo’s Fire is coming-of-age film showcasing life right after college (instead of high school) for a group of friends as they navigate romantic relationships, beginning careers, and their sense of self, and the bond of friendship now as adults.
The Graduate
Easily the oldest one on this list, the classic film depicts the in-between time right after college when young adults consider what’s ahead. The track is often laid out for them: go to school, get a job, and get married. If that is what’s pushed on everyone, it brings into question what is actually going to make you happy.
Almost Famous
Told through the eyes of a teenage journalist and music fan, William is on assignment from Rolling Stone magazine to cover an up-and-coming band’s tour. On the road, he is exposed to the dynamics between bandmates and their fans, where the line is between being a journalist and taking part in what’s happening around him as a human and friend, and the overall complexities of relationships.
Notable Mentions
Holes
I saw Holes repeatedly when I was younger and it isn’t until watching it with adult eyes that I noticed the troubled cases that led the characters to arrive together. The story touches on the value of friendship, the impact of violence and history, and the detrimental way that one moment can change everything.
Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants
Is there a truer depiction of friendship than four best friends who use letters and a pair of jeans to keep them connected over the course of a summer? Each of the friends has their own unique adventure and story about growth, experiences, and love.
If I Stay
When a talented young violinist gets into a car accident with her family, she stands precariously between life and death as she reconsiders the life she has been living and if it is worthwhile to carry on. While I thoroughly enjoyed the book more, the film portrays the way family and friends can create such a supportive system to allow the young main character to trust herself and what she wants.
Say Anything
The thing that stands out about Say Anything is the maturity and pure relationship between the main characters. While it’s a rom-com by genre, it captures two teenagers right out of high school with their own established goals and self-identity. They think they have it all together, and for a moment they do, but each of them bring out areas and qualities in each other’s lives in a way some adult relationships in film may never even show.
The Breakfast Club
It might seem overplayed when millennial culture revisited The Breakfast Club but this movie is pretty quintessential high school. Teens from different cliques all connect through one Saturday detention at school. It definitely illuminates how, no matter their social circle, everyone has their own struggles and insecurities.
Pretty in Pink
As a teenager, this was my personal favorite 80s movie so it deserves a place on this list. Andie is a poor girl, not part of the in-crowd in high school, which is all she craves. Her best friend sees her for who she is despite her striving to be more and fit in with the cool crowd. Financial privilege, popularity, and impactful relationships are what make this a stand out film.
That’s my list! Do you think I missed any films?
You can find the coming-of-age trope in many films of olden times and now. Everything from The Outsiders to Scott Pilgrim vs. The World alludes to the issues teens and young adults face while growing up. It’s a fascinating and relatable time, however it shows up in film, so it never gets old for me.
I hope you’ve enjoyed this list of my favorite coming-of-age films! Do you see the personal development and self-growth aspects that I’m fond of? What are your favorite coming-of-age films? Do share in the comments!
Xo Melanie
P.S. Check out my other favorite movie list inspired by the Fall Feels here.
Like this post? Pin it!
